Who Mistook the Steak for Chicken?

2004-02-20T17:02:00.000-05:00

Goodbye Song

Well folks, we've moved....

http://www.livejournal.com/users/paranoidfloyd/

It's just...better. I may be back, if it really isn't, though.

Sniff, I'll miss this sandbox.

2004-02-17T00:03:00.000-05:00

Are you sure you want to delete that item?

Well, I've just deleted Sharon from my life, basically.

Anything that I owned, not clothes or cds, but anything stupidly sentimental, I got rid of. I deleted every e'mail, every saved conversation. I threw away every letter, every note, and even, this was the hardest part, that notebook that we used all of last year, "THE" notebook. I kept a few pictures, I wasn't that hasty, but I tossed all those ones from the Snow Day last year, just everything.

I came home from seeing 50 First Dates today and got this urge to just straighten out my things, and of course I come across all this stuff. And in this burst of zeal, I just tossed everything. Maybe I shouldn't have gotten rid of that notebook. Maybe so, if she weren't a heartless evil bitch.

It's hard to imagine. One day you have a best friend, and the next she's completely ignoring you and that's that. And you know the weirdest part, is that I haven't been upset by it yet? I mean, I've gotten these little twinges, but nothing major. Just the opposite in fact, I find I've become this happy outgoing person, and school has become somewhat...FUN. I've made new friends, most of all with Charlotte, who is this incredible person, and I just never knew because Sharon always badmouthed her, not completely outright just by saying randomly negative things about her. And I find we have so much in common, it's just weird, I can't even express it.

I wonder when I'll start feeling crappy about it. Maybe around graduation time. I just feel bad for her now, and I can't even explain why. It's like, when I look at her, I think of this pitiful wet, mangly dog. This is going to sound so mean, but she just gained this huge amount of weight, and I don't know, she always looks so depressed. I guess that's something I just didn't see when I was friends with her. I don't really think she's depressed, she just projects that image, because she thinks it's cool. And I did too, until I was able to step out of the box. What a sad picture.

So yes, this is goodbye, and getting rid of all that stuff finalized it. More eerie than sad, more comforting than upsetting. Whatever happens to her, I hope she...finds whatever the hell it is that will make her happy with herself, because once she gets out into the real world, people won't put up with her constant moodiness. Oh well, her own fault.

I'm about to OD on nostalgia, heehee. Okay there we go. Oh yeah and Valentines Day, pfft :D

2004-02-04T23:08:00.000-05:00

It's Oh So Quiet...

Things have never been so...uneventful.

As in, nothing is going on, at all. For "AWESOME OMFG SENIOR YEAR !!!11!!!111!!!11'one" it's actually been pretty dull. I mean sure, great things have happened like:

I went to The Stills this past Thursday! It was a terrific show, and perfection-Lita and Couirey were all the way up front when I got there, so I squeezed through to the front too and was able to get awesome pictures during the show. I should be a photographer. "Every girl goes through a photography phase, right?" So says Charlotte in Lost In Translation.

Which is a beautiful movie.

I've become so scatterbrained these past few weeks. Maybe it's my diet of celery, lettuce, and cheese. Certainly paid off as I lost seven pounds in a week. I feel great and light, I'm almost floating, just a few more pounds. Thank you, Mr. South Beach.

Speaking of scatterbrained, I wasn't done with the Stills show. After it was over, Lita and I went downstairs to get our coats, and as I turn the corner, the first person I see.

Carlos.

Hint: Interpol.

And he is so much more beautiful in person than you would ever imagine. My heart stopped, I did the whole four-year-old sweating giggly thing, and that's when Couirey (bless his heart) decided to step in for me. He went over to Carlos and said, Hi, my friend is a big fan, she's a bit shy...the whole thing. And sigh, Carlos was so sweet and he took a picture with me and ah! I hardly ever get that way, but I just love Interpol so much and I couldn't take it.

Wasn't nearly as exciting when I met Dan and Paul (of afformentioned Interpol) but still, really awesome. Dan was a bit not-nice, but sort of came off as shyness. Paul wasn't that nice, eh. But still, what an amazing experience. One of my favorite bands of all time, it was fucking incredible.

Of course, it took about two hours to get home, and those damn subways must have been air-conditioned or something, because I woke up Friday morning with 102 fever and spent the weekend in miserable agony. And it was completely worth it, I would do it again twenty times over. Achoo.

Now, looking forward to February break, a week of bliss! And of course, my wonderful Jeff Lewis always pulls through:

Feb 21 - The Knitting Factory Old Office, New York City, 74 Leonard St, with Ish Marquez & the Drive By Proposals

Jeff AND Ish Marquez! That's fucking terrific, I will be there, please God! Not another Bluestockings episode, heehee. Actually, I think Couirey and Christy are going to see Elefant that night. Damn, I wanted to go to that show too, hmph. Jeff will have to do, yee haw.

Right, February break after I survive this weekend - Senior Weekend in Riverdale (wee?) and my Math Midterm next week, which is really more like a final as school is over in 49 days. Yes, I said forty fucking nine. But that's not including breaks and weekends, sigh.

Alright, back to My Bloody Valentine.

2004-01-11T22:03:00.000-05:00

How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Major Deegan Expressway

On Friday, I ventured to my friend Benay's house for a fun-filled weekend in Riverdale (a tiny pocket in the Bronx that's inhabited by white people). I expected the usual fun: sitting, eating, eating, maybe some TV, maybe something fun on Saturday Night, maybe some sitting. Nothing very out of the ordinary did I expect.

*The experienced or "in-tune" reader may realize that the term "Nothing very out of the ordinary did I expect" is both a very awkward souding phrase and a very nifty and unoriginal way to foreshadow the events that took place on Saturday night*

So Friday, for some bizarre reason, I decided to give that guy I had met last Saturday night (while waiting for Couirey at Union Square to go to the Jeff Lewis show at Bluestockings, which turned out to have been the night before-doh!) a call, cos he seemed really cool. So I called him, and we decided to hang out for a bit on Saturday night, with Benay and her boyfriend Sam. Fine. We had fun Friday night, stayed up, talked a lot, you know, "girl stuff" neener heehee.

Saturday we woke up pretty late, eeps, and after lunch I showered and Benay did my hair-she ironed it, it looks straight and uncurly now. But I love it and must buy that nifty iron she used (nifty count: 2). Then she did my makeup which was nice too. Anyway, alright. So we met Sam and went downtown and met this guy who turned out to be insanely creepy and so after being insanely creeped out, we ditched him and dined at the wonderfully manufacturedfoodheaven Olive Garden, oh yum. Waiter-Patrick-yum as well, mwahaha.

Then, Benay's friend Avi met up with us, and we walked hours to his car cos he FORGOT WHERE HE PARKED IT IN NEGATIVE DEGREE WEATHER and so we finally found it and drove Sam to the subway and then started driving around, looking for something to do. At this point it was already about 12:20, so we decided to all just go back to Benay's house.

So we're driving, and it's kinda bumpy so AFTER we get on the Major Deegan Expressway (der) Avi goes-I wonder why it's so bumpy. So he pulls over and sure enough, there's a flat. Since most Jewish boys are sheltered and don't know how to do things like change tires, Avi had to call the AAA and within ten minutes a tow truck came.

Jewish boys aren't the only ones who can't change tires. Turns out the guy who'se supposed to be making his living changing tires couldn't do it either. So we're sitting in Avi's car as the AAA guy is doing some sort of raindance outside in the four degree weather, and finally he comes back and tells Avi that he has to turn the car around while he blocks the highway up. It took about five minutes cos turns out Avi can't turn a car around either, so the AAA guy came and did it for him meanwhile, blocking traffic which was awesome, what a feeling of power, mwahaha.

So now the car is turned around, and the AAA guy hooks it up to the tow truck and informs us that he's towing the truck to the nearest car-fixing place. Only problem-me and Benay had to stay in the car AS IT WAS BEING TOWED. Avi got to sit in the tow truck, we had to stay in the half-elevated car, which was speeding backwards down the highway. It was literally one of the most terrifying five minutes of my LIFE. Benay and I were sitting in the backseat cracking up and screaming and threatening the unpresent Avi that we were about to shit out of fear in his backseat. It was hysterical and frightening and fucking hysterical.

We get to the car place and again, wait for hours until someone clues us in as to what's going on. We find out that Avi has to pay something like 80 dollars for everything, so this same AAA guy told us to go to the ATM down the block.

This is when we noticed that we were on E. 140, which is essentially, the most black and quite the most crackridden drugdenned area of New York City. We were white, we were Jewish, and we were scared shitless. Needless to say, AAA's cautionary suggestion-"Eef you have to go to de ATM, tayke de two gurls weeth you, lahck yore car dores, hide yore monies under yore coat ahnd bee qweeck."-did not help matters too much. We started to walk to the ATM but decided that Benay would just lend Avi the rest of the money. Who knows why she decided to do that, it's always been a dream of mine to be mugged, raped, and shot in East Harlem.

At this point, we (together now known as the traveling circus group-The Farting Mormons) returned to the car, paid, locked the doors, rolled up the windows, and zoomed out of there. Never (hopefully) to return. Back to the confines of another AmericanJewishWhiteTown.

Which, for once, wasn't a bad thing at all.

2003-12-17T22:51:00.000-05:00

Yawn, oh yawn.

AntiUp Volume 1 on my doorstep today, finally. Good stuff.

Listening to the CD. Joie DBG, noice.

Oh, void.

Winter break, six days and counting till my face turns blue.

Speaking of blue, Jeff Lewis at Bluestockings the third! Nice!

Shit, forgot to call Capitol lady back. Looks like I'll get fired before I've actually begun, oh fucksticks.

Saddam is caught and this will be the only thing we hear about for the next two months. That and Howard Dean, the world's most self-righteous prick. I support no one in this blasted election.

Philosophical wax of the day:

Politics=the runs.

Budum Tish

2003-12-11T01:25:00.000-05:00

Euphoric

After three and a half years of working like a maniac and dying over schoolwork, crying, late nights, fighting with teachers, all nighters, grey hairs (literally GREY), insomnia, nervous stomach, mouth sores, exhaustion, depression, and helplesness, it's all over. Finally cos...

I GOT INTO BOSTON UNIVERSITY! My letter came today and after hours of KNOWING that it came (from my grandma) I FINALLY got in touch with my mom and she read the letter to me over the phone. I almost cried from relief.

Nothing could make my day any better. So I thought. Cos then I called the woman who was dealing with my application for the Capitol Street Team and she told me I'm on! This means I'm a wee low on the ladder volunteer for Capitol records. Basically, I go to different places, like coffee shops, small record stores, mostly places downtown, etc...and I hang up flyers for concerts and new records for bands that are under the label. I also get to go to concerts for said bands, and I hand out promo CDs and stuff and I review each show...basically it's AWESOME. And I don't get paid, but thats okay cos I get to go to SHOWS and I get to be involved and that's AWESOME. I'm insanely psyched. And it gets to continue when I go to college (PLEASE G-D IN BOSTON) well if it's in Boston, I'll be transfered to be a Boston rep. I'm sort of just spewing right now cos I'm at Lizzie's and it's so late and today has been awesome.

Bands on Capitol:

http://uk.towerrecords.com/label_title.asp?label=Capitol&oldid=7d12760a0b5ca6b5bf

Who knows, maybe I could be the next best friend of Chris Martin :p (and get rid of Gwynnie, mwahaha. DOWN WITH THE NEW YOKO! She's already nixed two of their new songs because she didn't like them. Stupid bitch.)

Except I got into a fight with mom, sigh what else is new?

But even that can't spoil my mood, things are finally going okay. Well, for the moment. They could get bad at any second. Jesus Christ, I'm such a negative thinker, this has GOT to go away. Soon, soon.

WOO HOO

MAJOR MATT MASON USA!

2003-12-05T17:37:00.000-05:00

Tidbits

1) Now that I'm out one best friend, what do I do? I'm getting over it surprisingly quickly though- it's only been three days and I'm hardly thinking about it. So either I'm good at getting over things, or I'm just in extreme denial. I guess I'll find out in a matter of a few weeks.

2) So what I had thought all along was confirmed today. I always KNEW that hunger and horniness were connected cos whenever I get horny, my appetite shoots through the roof and I start eating everything in site.
What I learned in Psych class today:
When a certain rat's lateral hypothalamus was stimulated, it started humping everything in sight and then eating and eating...Eventually the sexual drive dissipated and the rat just kept eating until it grew into a very very FAT rat. Translation-a horny girl is not a happy girl for more reasons than one.

3) London Calling is really one of the most overrated songs in history.

4) I'm so glad the skating season is back and that Scott Hamilton is looking healthy. He's still got a few more shows left in him.

5) About a week until the Boston University letter comes, telling me whether I'll be invited to join the class of 2008. It would be particularly fabulous if they decided to invite me to join the class of 2008 free of charge.

6) It's snowing like fuck out there. Lots of accidents. I may hate Sharon forever for what she did, but I still hope she's okay, as a bunch of accidents have happened right by her house. Or maybe that would be extremely appropriate punishment. I'm still so angry that I'm not going to delete that previous sentance.

7) Maybe am going to Carson Daly on Wednesday with Tal and Jack. ONLY because the Rapture is playing. I swear it. N0 1'M N07 1 L0V3 CAR$0N, 0K4Y, H3 7074LLY R0XX0R5 MY 50X.

8) I felt how you did that. How did you know how to do that? I had three handles. Read these words. New York Wierd. New Jerseywierd. Connecticut

WIERD.

2003-11-26T23:02:00.000-05:00

The Painters Are In...

Note:

Agent=Shar
Travis=Me

AgentCher007: btw....
AgentCher007: hahahahhaha
AgentCher007: HAHAH
AgentCher007: OKAY
AgentCher007: so i ran out of tampons yesterday
AgentCher007: in school
AgentCher007: so i stuck some toilet paper up there
Travisgirl28: HAHAHAH
Travisgirl28: WDE
AgentCher007: and was like: "okay, ill just change it later"
AgentCher007: and a couple of periods later i was going to the bathroom to change it
AgentCher007: and i get on the toilet and pull down my THONG
AgentCher007: and realize that the toilet paper is gone
AgentCher007: MEANING
AgentCher007: it fell out somewhere
AgentCher007: in school
AgentCher007: in the hallway
AgentCher007: or in class
AgentCher007: WDEEE
AgentCher007: hahahahhahahahah
AgentCher007: i was like: "OMG thats horrible. oh well."
AgentCher007: hello?
Travisgirl28: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Travisgirl28: HHAHAHAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Travisgirl28: HAHAAAAAAAAAAAA
AgentCher007: HAHAHHAHA I KNOW...HOW TERRIBLE?
Travisgirl28: I AM DYING
AgentCher007: hahahahahahhahaha
Travisgirl28: HOWO DID YOU NOT TELL ME THIS BEFORE???????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Travisgirl28: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AgentCher007: i was so embarrased!!!!!!
Travisgirl28: COUCH HACK AHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Travisgirl28: HAHA WHAT IF SOMEONE SAW?
AgentCher007: i thought someone would find it and
Travisgirl28: OMG
AgentCher007: you would start laughing and give me away
Travisgirl28: HAHHHHHHHHHHH I CANT BELIEVE IT
Travisgirl28: HAHAHHAHAAH THAT IS SUCH A CLASSIC STORY
Travisgirl28: WIAIT I HAVE TO READ AGAIN
AgentCher007: hhahahahahhahahah okay
AgentCher007: like, it just FELL OUT
AgentCher007: i guess my thong was too loose,
AgentCher007: or too thin or somethingq
Travisgirl28: omg HAHA
Travisgirl28: WAIT LET ME READ
Travisgirl28: aahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Travisgirl28: what if it fell out?>?
Travisgirl28: and someone SAW it fall out?
AgentCher007: HAHAHHA
AgentCher007: HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
Travisgirl28: AUAHAHAHAHA
Travisgirl28: LIKE WHILE YOU WERE WALKING DOWN THE HALLWAY
Travisgirl28: OMG IMAGINE SOMEONE FINDING IT
Travisgirl28: EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Travisgirl28: IEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
AgentCher007: i KNOW it fell out, cuz it wasnt in my underwear, it wasnt in the toilet, and it wasnt on the floor of the stall
AgentCher007: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
AgentCher007: I WOULD DIE
Travisgirl28: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
AgentCher007: I WOULD DIE OF LAUGHTER
Travisgirl28: SO SO SO BDE
Travisgirl28: HAHAH I WOULD HAVE DIED
Travisgirl28: SERIOUSLY
AgentCher007: HAHAHAHAH ME TOO
Travisgirl28: I WOULDNT HAVE BEEN BREATHING
AgentCher007: hahahhahahahahaha omg
AgentCher007: ewwwwwww
AgentCher007: imagine picking it up
Travisgirl28: HSHA
Travisgirl28: IM SORRY
Travisgirl28: THAT NEEDS TO GO IN MY BLOG
Travisgirl28: NEEDS
Travisgirl28: no one reads it antyway
AgentCher007: hahahahahaahhahahahahahahah oh god
Travisgirl28: HAHAH
Travisgirl28: hahaha SO
Travisgirl28: ikat hold on
AgentCher007: hahahah oay
Travisgirl28: NO TYPIE
AgentCher007: i need to change my tampon anyway
Travisgirl28: hah

2003-11-20T21:46:00.000-05:00

Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch

Today was utterly fanTASTIC.

It began as a regular day...class, cramming for my sixth period Psychology test. Then came the sixth period Psychology test, which was actually pretty fucking difficult, but I'll worry about that later.

I came out of my Psych test completely exhausted. The thought of attending ANOTHER class and being in school for three more hours was physically nauseating. But that's how it is everyday and so, dejected and falling asleep, I trudged to my locker and took out my crumbling history notebook. Then, looking at the barren wasteland that is the senior hallway one last time, I pressed the "up" button and waited for the elevator.

Until! A certain Sharon came traipsing down the hallway, head in clouds, smile on face...I knew something was up. Either she had just been fucked really REALLY well against the wall of the boy's locker room OR she was about to make a run for it.

"Do you think it would be a good idea? Will they catch me? My parents aren't home and I have the car!"

Yes. Probably not. WOO HOO!

What was there to do? My best friend was leaving school, leaving ME to sit through a DOUBLE period of history, math, and an english test.

I thought not.

So, furiously nodding our heads, we made a break for it. Being outside while the rest of the school was not was completely exilharating. We got into Shar's car and blasted Adam Green all the way down 17 South.

We first made our way to Panara to use the bathroom and then to CD World where we spent an unearthly amount of time talking about the awfulness of emo and CKY and complaining about how broke we were. I saw Mogwai's Happy Songs for Happy People, Adam Green's Garfield, the new Walkmen ( I don't know the name of the album) and the Still's Logic Will Break Your Heart. And I couldn't get ANY of it. Oh my lack of funds is highly irritating.

Then came what we had been waiting for-the discovery of a LIFETIME! There, under Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch was an actual FULL-LENGTH album for .49 cents. SO what the hell, right?

I managed to part with the .25 needed to buy the album (you don't know how difficult that was and how I've come to highly appreciate what I once called "chump change"). But I did, and so did Shar, and we excitedly ran to her car to play the album.

Explosions! Sounds of exstacy burst forth from the stereo as the ever so profound ryhmings of Marky Mark played. Especially deep was Track 4-titled, simply, Loungin'. Here's a little sampler:

"How you feelin', G?"
"I'm loungin'."
"How you feelin', B?"
"Yo, I'm jus' loungin'."
"How you feelin', B?"
"Yo, I'm jus' loungin' ski."
"How you feelin', cheese?"
"Yo, I'm jus' loungiiiiiiiiiiiiiin. Lounginnnnn."

I swear. I swear I swear. This playing while anyone is driving-quite the dangerous combination. We were literally, CRACKING UP for an hour and listening to that song over and over and over. There is nothin' like "old school."

Then we went to National Wholesale Liquidators, cos Diana had bought converse there for ten bucks. Excited about buying white ones to draw all over with permanent marker ( I would draw anything to do with Antifolk and Teen Girl Squad and Shar would write a ton of song lyrics (we thought about this for a while)), we ran into the store and found the Converse Bin, only to discover that there were no sizes below a womens 13. Fabulous. SO we left,and hung out at Co0l Beans for a while (the Jersey equivalent to Alt. Coffee) and then Shar drove me back to school, just in time to make the bus.

A great and MUCH needed day.

2003-11-13T23:38:00.000-05:00

Tidbits

Holy fuckers, the wind, the WIND!

LAY OF MY FUCKING WINDOWS YOU WHORE.

Shar-"I think you have tourettes."

DAMN STRAIGHT, CUNT.

I love my friends.

Me-"I think I'm bipolar."

RE: Grey Revell is the new Jeff Lewis.

ANTIFOLK OWNS YOU.

New York.
Wierd.
New Jerseywierd.
Connecticut

Wierd.

wierdwierdwierdwierd
wierdwierdwierdwierd
wierdwierdwierdwierd
wierdwierdwierdwierd

2003-11-06T21:35:00.000-05:00

You're a part time lover and a full time friend
The monkey on your back is the latest trend
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
I'll kiss you on the brain in the shadow of the train
I'll kiss you all starry eyed my body swingin' from side to side
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
Here is the church and here is the steeple
We sure are cute for two ugly people
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
Pebbles forgive me, the trees forgive
So why can't you forgive me
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
I will find my niche in your car
With my MP3, DVD, rumble pack guitar
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
Up up down down left right left right B A start
Just because we use cheats doesn't mean we're not smart
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
You are always tryin' to keep it real
I'm in love with how you feel
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
We both have shiny happy fits of rage
You want more fans, I want more stage
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
Don Quixote was a steel driving man
My name is Adam I'm your biggest fan
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
Squinched up your face and did a dance
Shook a little turd out of the bottom of your pants
I don't see what anyone can see in anyone else...but you
but you

The Moldy Peaches~Anyone Else But You

Dedicated to Yoni :oD

That depression is gone, thank goodness. I'm basically better, some little things here and there, but for the most part I'm back. However, I do have an entirely new perspective on men.

Men are...

like pacifiers.

You depend on them. Suck them. But sooner or later:

A) The pacifier grows moldy and you have to replace it.

OR

B) You outgrow the pacifier, and move on to...

Girls?

Okay, so maybe B only works in the most extreme of cases. But I like A. I like my analogy. I will never be analogy queen, but this definitely must get me some points.

Today, I was in my vice principal's office, cos I was whining about my bitch Spanish teacher, and we were talking about other things, etc. Towards the end of our meeting, my math teacher comes into the office and hands my vp a notebook-Yoni's bio notebook. And she said, "Here Elaine, could you please give this to Yoni, I just found it in my room." So she says sure, and I'm like, "OH, I KNOW YONI! I CAN GIVE IT TO HIM!"

And so of course Elaine was like, "That's okay, Tal, I have to speak to him anyway so I'll return it to him then." But silly me I kept going. I said-"Please, I know him, he's so cute!" and Elaine goes, "You're right, he's a cutie." But she didn't give it to me. Then on the way out of her office, she hands me the notebook and says-"This is my favor to you."

Armed with Yoni's precious Bio notebook, I charged down the hallway straight into the girls' locker room and peeked through. No doodles, no song lyrics, no nothing. It was okay, yet a tad dissapointing. Anyway, I finally found him second-to-last period and he goes, "I've been looking for that all day! How did you get it?" So I told him and we laughed.

Yeah, he's not just some guy I have a crush on. I am actually friends with him, I got him into Jeff Lewis :oD

So he goes, "Shit, I didn't do my homework and my excuse is that I lost my notebook, can you keep it for me until next period?"

I brought the notebook to math and spent the forty minute period making him the most bizarre pictures ever. The first was just some wierd person with a tire around his neck, complaining about his 72 on the most recent math test. Of course, it was just me dressed as a man with no eyelids. Sad, really.

The second one was was of an anorexic, looking up at clouds made to look like my history teacher, and the sun was clearly high. There was also a drunken sheep that said "moo", an empty table set for a tea party and hydrogenated tomatoes. One of the greatest pictures ever. And it's Yoni's. He had better fucking appreciate it.

Maybe I'll steal the notebook from his locker and make a photocopy. Hmm, possibilities abound.

In the mean time, I wonder how long this will take...

2003-10-29T00:24:00.000-05:00

I've never really understood suicide. Like, how people could get so depressed that they choose to end their lives because there's just no hope for anything better. The idea of "losing the will to live" has always been so foreign to me...why would anyone willingly give so much up?

I'm not saying I've been driven to suicide or that I've even been having suicidal thoughts. It's just that for the first time in my life, on my seventeenth birthday, I can finally understand why people do it. Why people don't see a point in any of it anymore.

Half of my "friends" forgot about my birthday.

Life right now is just so awful that all I want to do is crawl under my covers and hide and not have to face anyone. For the past few days, going to school hasn't been just an annoyance or even something that I dread-it's become somewhat of a dead-end. The same friends. The same classes. The same hallways. The same applications. The same tests. Nothing new. Nothing to look forward to.

Even the thought that in under a year, I would be in college and in a new and more exciting environment, used to entice me. And if not entice me, it would at least give me some glimmer of hope, that this tediousness wouldn't drag on forever. But now that my applications are basically done, I see that I will most likely wind up in a school that depresses me just to thinking about it, simply due to financial reasons, and I just want to shut myselp up even more. Because if I can't have any hope for the future, then what CAN I have hope for?

Nothing.

I've been rejected by a guy I really like. One date and suddenly he treats me like I have leprocy. I didn't do anything wierd. I was just me. Then again, maybe that was where I went wrong.

I'm constantly watching as my grandmother and my mother duke it out, and while I am obviousely on my mother's side, I've just been so sickened by it all lately that I've just stopped caring. It's like I live with a married couple that's on the verge of divorce. Only it's worse. And all I want to do is escape the house, and all I want to do is escape from school, so the only time I'm ever at peace now is when I'm just wandering the streets of this wonderful city. I've even been purposely missing the bus just so I get to school later and I can have a bit of time to myself in the morning, while taking the subway and bus to school. That has become my only time to myself, the only time when I'm not swimming in utter futility.

I don't care about my social life anymore. I don't care about college anymore. I don't care that my average has slipped from an A to a C. I just don't care anymore.

All I want is to be myself again.

A happy birthday it was.

2003-10-26T00:48:00.000-04:00

Well...

That went horribly.

2003-10-18T00:14:00.000-04:00

I apologize for that.

Burp.

Hiccup.

2003-10-11T16:07:00.000-04:00

This is no coincidence my friends...

A bit later I will write about my tutor.

2003-10-02T22:14:00.000-04:00

My best friend's a butcher, he has sixteen knives
He carries them all over the town at least he tries,
Oh look it stopped snowing
My best friend's from Poland and, um, he has a beard.
But they caught him with his case in that public place
That is what we had feared

He severed segments secretly you like that
He always took the time to speak with me
I liked him for that.
He severed segments so secretly you like that
He always took the time, he always took the time

My best friend's a butcher, he has sixteen knives
He carries them all over the town at least he tries,
Oh look it stopped snowing
My best friend's from Poland and, um, he has a beard.
But they caught him with his case in that public place
That is what we had feared

He severed segments secretly you like that
He always took the time to speak with me,
I liked him for that
He severed segments so secretly you like that.
He was growing on me.
He was growing on me.

Roland~Interpol

I have been a wreck these past few days. Just because I have tests coming out of my left nostril. I took math, spanish and english today, each test was murderously difficult (Yes, EVEN english) and I am physically and emotionally wiped out.

The BU representative came to speak to us today. He was young and cute, and of course all those jappish girls were flirting with him (have some goddamn pride!) and Shar and I were just sitting there, laughing like goons up over him. He didn't crack a smile for the first twenty minutes, just spoke. He was like a corpse, a walking, gorgeous, fluid corpse.

But the more he spoke, the looser he got and even said that if Danny attended the school of engineering but also wanted to take a ballet class at the school of arts, then he could definitely do so. I shouted ballerina! Everyone was already laughing, I think the BALLERINA! was just for my own amusement. I also think that because I've known Danny my entire life and have always had the sneaking suspicion that he played for the other them, the rep's little comment made me laugh a lot longer than everyone else.

So we all went to ask him questions after, and we're all talking and i spoke to him a bit...and then a perfectly REDICULOUS me moment. I said "I'M TALYA AND I'M APPLYING EARLY SO REMEMBER ME, OKAY!?"

Then he chortled (If anyone could do it...hehe) and shook my hand. So maybe he thinks I'm retarded. Or maybe he WILL remember me!

I've been listening to Interpol nonstop for the past week. Especially Roland. I was on the bus the other day and listening to it, and all of a sudden, the story of the song hit me and I started to bawl. Right there, just BAWLING. It's such a sad song with such a heart wrenching message.

It's about this guy, who is lost and alone in the world. No one pays attention to him, so he finds simple friendship in a murderer, because he's the only person who'll give him the time of day. A simple smile and a hello from this guy, from Roland, makes this guy happier, and makes him feel like someone cares about him. And it doesnt matter that Roland kills people, the only thing that matters is that someone cares.

But then Roland gets caught and the guy is all alone, completely friendless again. He wants to be with Roland,just to be with his friend, but he can't, so he figures he'll tell his story. He leads people away to an isolated place and tells them what happened, in the hopes that one of them will think he's some sort of an accomplice and will call the cops. But no matter how much he sings and tells people, no one calls the cops, because no one thinks he had anything to do with the murders. They just see that he's a depressed and lonely guy, and they don't care to do anything about it. Look it stopped snowing-and he realizes his life is in the crapper.

What a song. What a fucking GENIUS piece of art.

Yoni. He is so fucking beautiful.

2003-09-27T18:16:00.000-04:00

Well, I was going to post, but this email to my best friend basically sums up what I would say, and I'm much too lazy to type something I've already typed this morning:

For reference:
1) BDE=Best day ever, an expression used whenever something is good, not just a day. For example-That guy is so gorgeous, he is just BDE.
2) WDE=Worst day ever, works along the same lines as BDE. For example-That test was SO HARD it was WDE.
3) Sharo and Talyo are not really our names. She is SharoN and I am TalyA. But we are wierd, so we think having O's at the ends of our names is just so cool. It really all began cos Shar's luggage said Sharo instead of Sharon, by mistake and when Shar told me, I couldn't let it go, so it just stuck.
4) I am obsessed with Jeff Lewis.
5) My math tutor is adorable. And smells really nice. And is young and smart.

~~~**Ahem,without any further ado**~~~

-----------------------------------------------------------------

(how the hell did that happen? I just wrote you an entire email and accidentally deleted it nooo IT WAS SO LONG. bah okay here i go again):

Well, how does this Rosh Hashanah afternoon find you, Sharo? How is everything going with the fam, better?

A few things I must say:

I was reading the book last night and absolutely dying. I was laughing so hard I choked on my saliva more than once and was being really loud and stuff. These parts made me especially pee my pants:

1) When that girl Bonnie comes, the hic girl, to visit David in new york, and they go to a flea market and it says...To Bonnie, angels were god's way of saying HOWDY. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA I DIE. That made me totally lose it.
2) But the part that made me lose it the most is when they were in the French class, and they were talking about holidays. So the Moroccan student didnt know what Easter was and they were all trying to explain it to him:
"He is nice, the Jesus."
"Jesus have of the long hair and he go to live above your head with your father."
"He come on the day for to say of the hello to the peoples."
OMG. OMFG. I was laughing SO HARD I THOUGHT I WOULD DIE. He is BRILLIANT! HAHAHAHA! I havent finished it yet, I have like forty pages left, I'm saving it for of the tonight heeeheeeheee.

Okay and now for the of to the other thing:

So last night after I finished reading, I put on the TV (Happy Rosh Hashanah) and Austin City Limits was on (Austin=BDE) and okay-
1) Spoon. BDE. They are sooooo good. I think you liked them, am I wrong? Anyway they're awesome, they were on for like a half hour and they're SO GOOD. I was seriousely losing it, not laughing but swaying. Seriousely BDE. New must get.
2) Okay so after Spoon was Ben Kweller. And so when you played him for me I didnt really like it, but you had said that he was a lot different live and HE IS. Like, if he had a live CD I would get it. That Sha-Sha song didn't sound half as retarded it was AWESOME. And then he played this other song, I dont know what it's called but he keeps going, "I'm wasted but I'm ready." It's really a catchy song and I was like, this cant be the same person! Also he really is sooo cute BDE. Nice hair. I like his face too.

Now of the other thing:

I sent you this link, for all these Jeff Lewis clips that ONE-you should really watch and TWO-I keep watching the second one, the cartoon one. That song oh fuck--you say you've got a heavy heart, you say you've got a heavy heart...The five lines that he sings in that clip are STUCK and INGRAINED in my head and I can't get them out. It's just like the songs on this album, just so heartfelt. That one's on the first album YAWN cough. Oh, glory days!

So this company that's showing those clips is coming out with a Jeff Lewis box set in TEN DAYS. And I emailed them asking how much it would be, and he said it would be 35 dollars plus shipping and handling. Basically I have ten days to get like, fifty bucks. I already have ten from my dog sitting this week but thats ALL I HAVE. I have to find a way to make forty dollars and i have NO IDEA HOW. I went through my CD collection and there's NOTHING I want to sell, and I wouldnt ask my mom for money for this cos she'd think it was rediculous.

So, hmm now I have to think and I'm seriousely at a complete loss. I have no idea what of the to do! How do you think I could make money? This is seriousely WDE. i NEED that box set. It has like, a DVD of live performances and interviews and little cartoons and a poster and a comic and stickers and UCH WDE. WDDDDDEEEEE. The guy said he would put one aside for me, cos theyre only making like 500 and in Britain, hes so much more famous so people would actually buy it. I am now going about, saving every penny I get. OHH YAY!

So the last thing---I still cant get my tutor's smell out of my head, it's stuck there forever. bde. wde.

Love always, Talyo.

2003-09-18T19:32:00.000-04:00

Without forty ounces of social skills
im just an ass
in the crack
of humanity.
im just a huge manitee.

Nothing Came Out~The Moldy Peaches

Well, this hurricane must be causing wierd stuff to happen, cos today was a totally bizarre day.

1-I actually have a full fledged thing for someone who's two grades younger than me. I am messed up. I'm a pedophiliac, compulsive LUNATIC.

2-Speaking of pedophiliac, I spoke to this guy today, this freshmen, who Ive wanted to speak to cos he looks exactly like Jeff Lewis. And hey if i cant have the real thing...
So i went up to him during the "Cougars On Ice" ice cream party, which is basically just a mini-pep ralley. He was standing at a sink, very gently wiping a spot of ice cream off his shirt, and I walked up to him and he just seemed so completely out of it, almost like he wasnt there. So I introduced myself, to this gorgeous, beautiful, yet really young guy, and he looked sort of confused and we were kind of standing there looking at eachother for a while. It was such a wierd moment-and I noticed how soulful his eyes are, almost deeply sad. I told him that he looked a lot like Jeff Lewis, so this sparked his interest, as he didn't know who Jeff Lewis was...and then so suddenly I felt like a moron so I just said I had to go.
Well later, I saw him, and realized I had acted like a moron, even though he was really shy too...and I went up to him and showed him the picture I had on me, and he didn't say anything and smiled. Then he asked what kind of music Jeff Lewis is, and I said Antifolk...and he didnt seem to know what it was, so I breifly explained, then he looked so interested, so I told him I'd burn him a copy of the album. We started talking a lot about music, and his face just changed, he lit up. He was so incredibly shy and softspoken...I felt like I was breaking some pricless piece of art by talking to him, but he seemed pretty pleased . I guess he was just confused that some random senior girl came up to him...I mean I would be too.
In fact, I remember when I was a freshmen, and I was talking to Jordan one day, and he's like, "yeah, a bunch of senior guys wanted to know your name so I told them." And of course that sparked my curiosity and held my interest for, oh...six months.

3- So school ended, and I walked out, got on the bus, flipped open my cell and my heart almost exploded in my chest. My phone read:

One Missed Call
Last Missed:
Mark
(number)

Mark. Mark called me. Mark called me on some random Thursday at 4:14 PM. Mark had the guts to call me after the way he treated me. Mark had the guts to call me after the way he just completely messed with my emotions and fucked me over. Mark had the guts to call me after we hadn't spoken since the last day of work, and even then only briefly. Mark called me and I almost had a heart attack.

First reaction-call Shar. So I called her and she calmed me down and just soothed me and listened which relaxed me a little. I was curious of course, so I called back and left a snooty and pretty cold message. I dont even care anymore. He's a thing of the past.

I was just in such a state of shock.

And now am exhausted. Hope we don't have school cos of Isabel tomorrow. I don't think we will, it's supposed to be mad out by one in the morning.

*crossing fingers*

2003-09-14T14:56:00.000-04:00

Kids love chicken pot pie.

Things to Note:

1) On this day, the all powerful Bennifer split, and as usual, no one gives a fuck.

2) I have 16 days to write a stellar college essay, and neither the willpower nor the brainpower to do so.

3) I am missing yet another Jeff Lewis show, due to the pile of work sitting on my desk.

4) Travis is playing at the Beacon on October 22. My favorite band. I would say HURRAY, FINALLY SOMETHING GOOD! But then again, by the time I get to the box office, tickets will probably be sold out.

5) This is a lackluster post. To match my currently lackluster state of mind.

Meh.

2003-09-11T19:41:00.000-04:00

Seriousely, when are memorial ceremonies any good?

I could go on and talk and talk about September 11th and how I was personally affected, being in the same city when it happened. I could be like my principle and make a really dull speech about Israel and America and suddenly find that half my audience is asleep.

But really, what good are memorial ceremonies when something so tragic happens? It's not like I don't REMEMBER it, or that it doesn't deeply sadden me everytime I think about it. Because it does and it's just that. Being so close, and going down there and seeing what had been done, there's nothing that tops that. No speech or ceremony or CNN documentary will do anything, because I went down there and I SAW. Once you see it with your own eyes, everything else seems pointless. And a principle's feeble attempts to make some sort of heart-wrenching presentation doesn't affect me, because nothing could after that. It just seems to me, that it's pathetic even to try.

Despite all my reflections and memories, ones which should have seriousely depressed me, I actually had a really awesome day. Should I feel guilty about it? I really don't know, it's not like you can help it when so many cool things happen in one day.

I guess first, we had the rest of debate tryouts during lunch. And as I sat there, me, actually deciding the future of my team, I was a bit disoriented for a bit. Yesterday, I was a freshman, trying out for the debate team, wanting so desperately to make it, and knowing that I was up against 60 or so freshmen, sophomores, and juniors, and we were all competing for four spots. And one of my most vivid memories at my school, a few days later, having some strange girl pass me in the hallway and say-"Hey are you Talya? You made the debate team!" And me running to the board and seeing my name. It was one of the most awesome moments of my high school career and NOW? Now I'm actually the fucking CAPTAIN. I'm in the same place as the girl who tried me out three years ago, who coincidentially was also named Talya! The process of choosing people to be on the team was hard. It took four days and three hours of tryouts to weed out the bad kids and get the good ones. And we had ten available spots this year, so its just kinda cool to think that I made it with four available.

Okay enough gloating.

And then there was interviewing this really awesome guy who's started a website for teens,he came to speak to the senior grade about it. He's such a cool guy, and it was me and him one on one for a good fifteen minutes, and I wonder if ALL jewish guys could be this cool, would I actually still consider staying in the jewish circle.

I just feel like I got a lot of attention today, which is always fun hehe. The freshmen who are now sophomores (How did Ilan get so goddam cute?) love me and Shar again (happy days!), that other sophomore, dammit. I'm a fucking senior and I've got a thing for a sophomore. I should be tranquilized. English and History classes would be intolerable cos of my really shitty teachers, but with Stephanie and Shar, they're so much fun. We just sit and pass notes and draw pictures and cause lots of un-needed commotion. AWESOME.

SENIOR YEAR ROCKS.

I hope it stays this way...

2003-09-06T15:57:00.000-04:00

Well we're back in school again...

Appropriate White Stripes lyrics for this time of year I would say. And what else can I say but one huge

MEH.

I had such an unbelievably AWESOME summer, and now, back in school and I've already gotten into a fight with my principal. I know that it's better to be outspoken than not, but I don't really want to intentionally piss anyone off, especially people who have to write me college recommendations in oh, two weeks or so. Shit. Well he IS a complete tyrant.

So nothing really new this year, except I'm a senior woo hoo. The first day of school was pretty wierd. It didn't feel like I had been away at all. And now that I'm a senior it feels like everyone is so goddamn young! It's definitely BIZarre.

Okay so a few interesting (I think) things:

In Talmud (oh how exciting) class yesterday, I was sitting,with Sharon next to me and Meir in front of me, all trying to drone out Halberstam's voice (even though he DOES have a pretty awesome Bostonian accent). I think I was just beginning to doze, when all of a sudden, our three heads shot up.

Our teacher had just said "beQUEEF" instead of 'bequeath."

Now for those of you who don't know, a queef is when a girl farts our of her vagina. Yes, it's totally possible, and more often than not, it makes a bubbly sound. Anyway, it's okay because it's pretty hold-in-able. Enough of the bio lesson.

There was complete silence. I thought to myself, "Okay Tal, you just totally imagined it."

But just to be sure...

I looked at Shar. She had this wide-eyed look. Eye contact. Suddenly, peels of hysterical laughter rang through room 13. It was completely uncontrolable. Every bone in my body was shaking from laughter, and Shar looked like she was gonna cry. Suddenly, looking ahead of me, and I see Meir's back shaking and wiggling, as if he was having a seizure.

Halberstam stopped speaking and looked at the three of us with a mixture of bewilderment and anger.

"Would you like to tell the class why you're laughing?"

Sharon: Let out the funniest giggle I'd ever heard. It was like...Ha--HA--- HA! in a sort of operatic voice.

Me: Nothing really, your class just makes me BUBBLE over with delight.

Sharon: Okay Tal, stop spewing.

Me: Laughter.

Meir: Hahahahahaha *snort snort* Hahahahaha.

Class: [stare].

I don't get it, had they not heard it too?

Halberstam: Okay well please stop.

Fifteen minutes later, and we're all still giggling uncontrolably. Okay so Shar was able to control herself. Meir was still laughing, so was I. It was great. And my stickuptheassish class had this "oh those baffoons" expression. They all belong in Chuck E. Cheese limbo with my principal.

Second thing: This junior Ronen and I wanted to start this underground school paper, you know, to expose all the shit that goes on with our school and the board and all that. The thing is that my principal is a madman, as I mentioned before. If we were caught, we would undoubtedly be expelled.

But if we could pull it off it would just be so awesome. We could be like, famous, only NO ONE would know who we were. It would just be--who ever the hell is doing this is AWESOME. Because we all despise the administration at my school, and we all know how crooked they are. It's just a matter of pulling it off without getting ourselves into some major shit.

I'll update on that.

Time to eat a fabulous tofu filled lunch. MMM. Tofu is LIFE.

2003-08-16T13:51:00.000-04:00

Blackout!

Wow. It happened after work, a few minutes after, when there were still some kids who hadn't yet been picked up. We thought it was just the kids playing with the lights so we were like, kids turn the lights back on!
Uh.
Kids.
Please.
Please!
And then the that voice over the loudspeaker---
"There has been a blackout in all of New York City! Everyone must evacuate the building as it will take hours to get power back!"
So what were we supposed to do with all those kids? We took them to a nearby playground and hung out with them and sat there whilst they played, completely oblivious to what was going on. The last was picked up at six, at which point Mark and I went to Central Park and hung out. He apologized for all that holier-than-thou crap, and even though I never admitted that I had been angry with him, he got it. It was really lovely, and got me over that huge romantic thing I had for him. I'm just happy that we're friends and that we can be comfortable with eachother...sometimes...despite the age difference.
We played frisbee for a while, which was so much fun, and then we heard music! So we walked in the direction of the music and lo and behold, The Indigo Girls were playing at Summer Stage with battery powered amps and microphones. It was pretty wierd, considering there was no power to be had anywhere. So we sat on top of a huge rock along with loads of other people and listened to the music. Met some really nice Greenpeace people and got a big game of frisbee going, which was also really fun. This guy Tyler, phew. You know, the Greenpeace type---Birkenstocks, long ratty hair in a ponytail. Sigh, wow, and of course, so nice. Mark was busy flirting with a cute Irish girl, and I was happy to find that it didn't bother me at all.
Okay maybe just a teensy bit, but mainly no.
Then walked home at about eight and sat in my courtyard all night, listening to the news and hanging out with my superintendent's perverted nephew, who was visiting from PA. Yeah. He kept asking me if I liked things that vibrate cos my phone was on vibrate. Yeah. Do they find that funny back in Podunk?
Went to bed, and at about five past six, all the lights and radio came on in my house...and then I called work and of course, while the rest of the city had the day off, I had to go into work! It was a pretty hellish day cos of the counselor shortage, and surprisingly, lots of kids showed up. After work came home and checked my mail...nothing from Jeff. Bastard, see people may seem nice but really. Well he was so genuine when we talked, maybe he just hasn't checked his mail. It's only been a few days, I'll give him some more time.
Re-reading that last paragraph, I definitely seem like a stalker. Well if all else fails, I can still be a groupie.

2003-08-13T22:10:00.000-04:00

DONT LET THE RECORD LABEL TAKE YOU OUT TO LUNCH.

my friends met me after work today
but i really didnt wanna see them
and its been that way lately
everyone just gets me bored
and i feel awful about it cos
i think im beginning to alienate people
the thing is i used to care
but now its not the same
i used to deny that i was anything
but a happy teenager
but today when my friends came to visit me after work
and i realized i had nothing to say
and even if i did i wouldnt want to say it
because i cant relate to anyone anymore
and when i speak i feel as if im commiserating with no one
because no one really gets me
they get insulted easily
when i just dont want to talk
i had a work function today at six
it was supposed to be really fun
and i thought
hey maybe ill have fun and talk and get free food
but when i got there all my friend wanted
was to put on some makeup
and standing with her in the bathroom
and staring at her clean white pumas
got me really depressed
so i ran out of the building as fast as i could
and i ran to central park and i sat on the great lawn
i just wanted to be alone
with my jeff lewis album
about toothpick factories in the sun
and i stared at the sky
my bag was digging into my back
i sprawled out on the grass
not caring about anything
and not feeling guilty about not caring
i was surprised when i started to cry
and i tried to rub my eyes but forgot i was wearing glasses
so i ended up smudging them and took them off
and wondered why i was so sad
and what could have been different lately to get me that way
there was a guy juggling next to me and i felt like punching him
i walked home at eight thirty
and from central park west to columbus i thought
people dont really love eachother
they think they do because when they love
it makes them feel good
but its never really true
everyone is selfish
all we want is a good ending and some money in the bank
and from columbus to amsterdam
i thought of the email i would send jeff lewis
and would i seem like a stalker
is it wrong to be in love with him
maybe its just that i relate so well to the music
and when i got to my building
i wondered what tomorrow would be like
but then i realized as i stepped into the elevator
that i just didnt care.

2003-08-01T18:14:00.000-04:00

My Life Is A Bleeding Mess!

Stupid things I have said or done in the past few days:

1) Threw one of those laughing balls at Ross, with a painted face that looked remarkably like Mark, then said HAHA MARK HIT ON ROSS!

2) During one of my many profound moments, while eating a cup of shit Breyer's ice cream stated :Life is like this ice cream. Stuck to a spoon and dripping.

3) Alone, had a fight with a giant piece of paper, then started cracking up. Jennifer came over to me, shocked, thinking I had lost it. No no Jen, I lost it a while ago. Back when...

4) I decided to fall madly in love with a twenty-five year old who acts like he's sixteen. Well that's not in the past days, just in the past weeks. I hate that we hang out. We go to parks and read together. And play frisbee. And go to concerts. WAH!! And I'm too young for him. Statutory rape MY ASS.

Well well. No one reads this blasted thing anyway. Maybe I should just stop. I have a writing journal. I just did this to get my thoughts out. Getting to be a bloody waste of time, innit.

AHH! Also I missed a Witnesses show cos those blasted morons didn't email about it till THAT SAME GODDAM DAY. And I've stopped checking my mail every day. Now every week. I have no time to be on the internet any more. Cos my days are so hectic, that I'm out at night, as sort of a HEY THIS SUMMER ISN'T SO BAD. YOU JUST CAN'T HAVE MARK. EVEN THOUGH HE FLIRTS WITH YOU AND LIES ON YOUR LEGS.

Bah.

2003-07-14T17:16:00.000-04:00

Spies came out of the water...

What applicable coldplay lyrics for today. A normal day of work, a bit more fun, all good, cheery woo hoo. But for some reason, a shite load of parents decided to come check on their kids. So when i took my break this one snooty parent comes up to me and says:

"Why are you not with my child right now???"

"I'm on my break."

"Umm, they didn't tell us you would be taking BREAKS. How can they hire such lazy people!!??" *Huff Puff Storm Away*

Yes, I know ma'am. Your son is the most perfectly well behaved, never obnoxious in any way kind of kid (just like you wow!) and so why would I ever need a break when there are SEVENTEEN MORE LIKE HIM!?

I should be fired.

Rawr, that is my vent for the day. One of my kids, Tess, has the sexiest dad ever. So my two work pleasures are: free hot dogs on Thursdays and Tess dad sitings. Wow, I knew this summer would be fascinating.

*points gun to head*

Anyway though, this weekend going to Shar's...and Saturday---Shar, Diana, and I are off to SIREN, a cool shizzin concert at Coney Island. Key performers-The Datsuns, Idlewild. WOO HOO! *phsyched*

Why do I feel like this post has no personality?

2003-07-10T19:13:00.000-04:00

I need a fucking tissue.

And there's no one here to get me one. Fuck the world. Would you believe, a nasty head cold in july. It's terrible, I feel like a goat's ass. And I have to deal with a thousand screaming five year olds all fucking day, being cheery and chipper and all. Well FUCK THAT but I cant, or Ill get fired.

So this past weekend I went to Diana's, and me her, sharon, rachel (kill me), and candy went to ridgewood to watch the fireworks. lovely, but mosquitos abound yuck. it was a fun weekend, I found a pair of lime green cons for TEN BUCKS. it rawked. also got a butthead pin. that was even better. hes my idol, after Beavis. I have seen the top of the mountain. And it is good.

Aw man, still feel shitey, I think Im going to get that much needed tissue.

*sneezes bright green snot all over monitor*

jesus im in a state. but also feeling really good, unburdened, relieved, calm, happy, and though coldy, still loving summer.

freedom rawks.

2003-07-08T22:32:00.000-04:00

How Bizarre...

Wow tonight was one of the wierdest nights I've ever had...

So I went to meet a friend for dinner and I was walking down the street, just walking the three blocks and one avenue to the restaurant and i swear...every single person that I saw or passed or layed eyes on...was completely beautiful. To the restaurant, at the restaurant, and walking home, only beautiful people. And i felt like humping my waiter. No fuckn joke he was without doubt the most gorgeous person I have ever seen. Tall, dark, this amazing face, perfect nose...okay I need a cold shower...hehe. Anyway, just being surrounded by beautiful models all night made me feel like i was in some sort of twilight zone, and i also felt short and frumpy. Rawr.

Okay I think ill continue this later, Im feeling pretty damn lazy.

Score.

Ciao

2003-06-21T19:39:00.000-04:00

Summer!!!!!!!!!

BDE! SUMMER!

And guess what? Finals are completely done, meaning...Junior year is over! And I'm oficially a senior. A fucking senior. Wow, they're not kidding when they say that highschool goes by quickly.

And I also fucked up all my finals and SAT2s. That makes me feel pretty fucking shitty but oh well, can't change anything now.

Wednesday was the awesome day, the last day of school. And it was really wierd cos no one was happy...no one was taking pictures, or running around being all smiley...the test just ended, and everyone left. It was so so wierd. I was astounded and it dawned on me that maybe I wasn't the only one having a shit time of it this year.Or maybe just Juniors, maybe I wasn't paying any attention to anyone else.

I came home and completely collapsed and just thought for ages about the past year and what had happened. I had a brief crying spell over Moose and all of them, but it was just cos I had never really gotten it all out. God, what a fucking great last day, huh? Taking a fucking math final, then coming home and bawling my eyes out and catching brief moments of uncomfortable and edgy sleep. Then I spoke to Gabrielle for like an hour, and by the time I got off the phone with her, I felt a lot better, and then I called a friend, and we went to see a movie. Bend It Like Beckham. Thrid time, a great movie.

This week, well since Wednesday, I've just been hanging out and having sort of a carefree time. I guess I just needed that little time period to think a bit, about myself, instead of exams. I hung out with AJ a bit, and that was nice. I also bumped into my seventh and eighth grade teacher, Rabbi Gold, and that was lovely, cos he's one of those few teachers I've actually ever respected. Who am I kidding, one of the few adults I've ever respected. Oh dear me and my inability to realize just what the fuck is so great about adults.

So yes, it's summer! Work starts in a week, and next week, well starting tomorrow, Eitan and I are attending the Columbia Scholastic Press Association conference, for a week, kinda excited for that. But mainly excited for summer, and no school and no tests and no annoying teachers, or vice principals, or principals, or assemblies, or SATs, or that sort of shit. At least till next year. Fuck well, two months. Great long break.

Tali

2003-06-12T00:02:00.000-04:00

I was just so in the mood to simply write...pour out my thoughts, about nothing in particular. So I guess I will.

It's funny, what some time with myself does for me. I have been so consumed with school and finals, that I have neglected so much, mainly...well, me. School has been so crazy these last months, so much that when I'm not working on something for school, I'm thinking about working on some essay or project or another trivial assignment which a teacher has chosen to ram down my throat, with absolutely no mercy. So I, along with the rest of my school mates, must swallow this terrible poison without any choice in the matter, without any say whatsoever in the way in which we will die. Or simply...just lose sleep. And then die. Because lack of sleep constitutes a weakened immune system and then suddenly, you have three weeks to live. We are...a moribund race. Those "lucky" intelligent few destined for some great future, a future too great to comprehend. A future we haven't asked for. A future which will take its carving knives and slowly and painfully prepare us for dissection by some random Med students who we were supposed to become, but couldn't...because...we just didn't make it. It is our future that we are being prepared for, but the thought of our future that will get us in the end.

And because of all of these fears, doubts, pressures, I have almost forgotten who I am. I have forgotten what makes me happy. I have forgotten what it's like to sit with a book,and read for hours on end, without a thought or care in the world. I have forgotten, simply, what it means to have free time. Free time, this unattainable treasure, Monte Cristo's gold, Jake's Brett. Something so untangible that...it's almost not real. And when I have it---joy! Blocks of time...all at my disposal. Only... what to do now?

Do you see what it's like? TORTURE.

Tali

2003-06-09T23:45:00.000-04:00

The Beautiful Lads of Travis

Everywhere there's trouble
Nowhere's safe to go
Pushes turn to shovels
Shovelling the snow
Frozen you have chosen
The path you wish to go
Drifting now forever
And forever more
Until you reach your shore

YOURE DRIFTWOOOOOOOOD FLOATING ON THE WATER BREAKING INTO PIECES PIECES PIECESS!

no matter what, no matter what bands im ever into

Travis is ALWAYS my number one!

Ive been through so much and that music has been by my side. i just wish they knew just HOW much their music affects me. Sigh me and the rest of the Travisworld. heehee. ahh well, thats just my travis BLURT for the week.

:-)

Tali

2003-06-09T14:59:00.000-04:00

*chortles*

ESTAV4: ohhh remember last year i had tarendash and then ashenberg
ESTAV4: on fridays
ESTAV4: so my friday afternoons were one big:
ESTAV4: TARENDASHENBERG

ahh i love my friends :8)

one physics final down

SEVEN MORE TO GO.

no not physics, seven other subjects, which i should be studying for right now...

Tali

2003-06-07T16:45:00.000-04:00

the first week in may, all over again

yes, because im studying nonstop for history. Ive got 1603 identifications to go through and im only on 652. WTF AM I GONNA DO? i havent even taken another writing practice test or thought of any essay topics. shit shit shit. In other news, im studying. bah. im also in a shitty mood. meh.

Tali

2003-06-07T12:29:00.000-04:00

shit on a stick.

i have sat2s tomorrow---FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. ive barely studied. well, restudied anyhow, for history and writing. But the thing im most nervous for is my physics final on monday. cos ill only get home at around one, and then ill study till like ten, but its just so fucking much. thank god for the fact that my physics teacher likes me. ohhh hes the shiz.

and even though im completely bogged down with work, to the point where im breathing all heavy, im still incredibly happy because aj just does that to me. i feel like a silly and stupid little girl, but i just haven't been able to stop smiling and giggling for the past two weeks or so. except for those few hours last saturday. those werent fun. but everything else is just lovely...

I've just always been this certain type...shoulders down, critical, pessimistic kind of person. and well i mean, i still am, but i haven't really been acting like my usual self lately. Maybe thats a good thing.

And because ive been so different lately, ive begun to notice my flaws. i mean, we all have our flaws, but i rarely stop and think about mine. and heres what made me think about it. At that barbeque on wednesday night, there was this guy there, whom my friends and i have affectionately come to call Asshole. Asshole is a giant asshole. There is not enough toilet paper for this asshole. he is asshole extraordianaire. okay, i think you get the point.

So anyway, i never really hide the fact that i think hes an asshole, so errm, hes known for sometime i think. So for some reason, even though hes not in my class, he was at this barbeque, and he and this other guy Jeremy were talking, and then asshole waved to me in you know that obnoxious way, like lets wave and smile even though i know she hates me. I mean, not in a nice way. So i just gave him a glare.

Anyway, later, sharon was telling me that right after, asshole goes to Jeremy, something like "Man, she hates me." and Jeremy was like, "Don't worry, don't be offended, she hates me too. She hates everyone."

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i do NOT hate everyone. i dont even hate ANYONE. there are just some people that piss me off. and anyway, jeremy doesnt even piss me off that much. hes just a racist, sexist piece of shit, so he annoys the crap out of me.

After that i got to thinking, wow does everyone think that? that i hate everyone? because i dont! and i dont want people thinking that. I guess im just confused because i have lots of friends, and theyre all nice people. Ive spoken to shar about this and shes said, you know, that people have a first impression of me, that im a bitch, but once they get to know me they realize its so not true at all.

I guess I just never take the time to realize that sometimes my kinda tough exterior really forms peoples' opinions of me. and even though, and please excuse the cliche, you should never judge a book by its cover, we all do. I dont know, so maybe ill just make the effort to be a little more friendly, just to random people. I mean, i AM a friendly person, it wouldnt mean changing myself or anything, it would just mean sort of showing people that im not some heinous bitch.

ughhhhh effort

its okay, sometimes we all need to make a bit of an effort.

And on that note
I
am
out.........

Ciao!

Tali

2003-06-06T00:23:00.000-04:00

Barbeques in the Pouring Rain-the next big thing to hit the tristate area...

Last night was one of the most bizarrely wonderful experiences of my highschool carreer.

Our class was going on a trip, and we planned to have a barbeque in the park after school. All well and good, until it started raining in the morning and continued throughout the day. And we all kept asking Rafi (a shizzin guy might i say, quite clever, and quite a businessman. hes going to make some girl very rich one day) when it would stop raining (like hes god or something) and he kept saying, "dont worry, it will stop." And we all believed him, cos you know, hes like fucking God. anyway, of course 5 o'clock rolls around and its pouring.

But we said, hey what the fuck, lets go anyway.

And so we did. We all went to the park, into this little gazebo, and started barbequing. Actually it was Rafi who was barbequing everything, i felt so bad and me and gabrielle kept asking him to eat and hes like "no no its okay" in the way thats like, yes im starving but im just a nice guy and everyone else needs to eat, not me.

Anyway, it kept on raining harder and harder, and there my class is: Twenty or so of us. Packed in to a small gazebo. Pouring rain all around us. Only small candles for light. Rabbi Bashist is sitting, with his guitar with one string missing, playing and singing only slightly off key. Us girls are sitting on a towel that Rabbi Bashist brought for us. Some guys are sitting with him, swaying and singing. Others are just sitting on a bench. Chili is feeding some geese (hmm). Rafi is still barbequing. Its getting darker and darker. The little crevices in the side walk around the gazebo are beginning to flood with water. The geese are taking refuge under some trees. Some are floating around on a pond. One may be dead, as a result of the frozen hotdog which it ingested after Rafi so graciousely offered the geese to partake in the festivities. People start to leave, its too cold. Some of us are still sitting and thinking. Its so dark out, already nine o'clock. Rabbi Bashist announces the end of the party. We go back to Frisch.It was lovely.

Funny, trying to separate yourself from something so restricting, yet so hauntingly beautiful and wonderous at the same time.

Tali

2003-06-05T16:50:00.000-04:00

will someone please tell me why i have that ass crazytown butterfly song stuck in my head? no. okay. wowie, yesterday, the class barbeque, was one of the craziest, funnest times ive had at frisch. but no time to tell now, wil update later in the day.

oh and also

CLASSES WERE OVER YESTERDAY!

HUZZAH!

PARTAY!

OW OW!

WOOOOOO!

BEST FUCKING DAY EVER!

Ciao!

Tali

2003-06-02T23:23:00.000-04:00

It's lovely being the center of attention for a while.

Today, Gemarah class was actually bearable. You know, cos schools over in two days (SOO GOOD!) so were kinda just hanging out in every class. And so Rabbi Bashist and the rest of the class, were reminiscing about the year in his class. Which i must say, has been something for almost everyone. Most students (and by that im referring to the ones with penii) absolutely adore the Bash. Only the bash has always had one fatal flaw, which is that hes completely fucking sexist.

Thats not to say that hes MEAN to girls, he just doesnt expect much from them, so he sort of treats us vaginas like shit. anyway, besides that hes a pretty nice guy, its just that one thing.

So Bash and i have always had problems with eachother. its just that i would fight back when he woud do something unfair, and so he branded me this "troublemaker." also cos in the beginning of the year, he was this scary guy who didnt take bullshit. And so the first day of school i was talking, and from there it went DOWNHILL. every day he would yell at me, give me zeros, talk to me after class etc etc.

But then after a while, after our class trip to Boston, he TOTALLY changed and became tons cooler, the guy everyone knows and loves now. still sexist, but at least nice, somewhat, and thats when he loosened up about behavior.

So today in class, we were doing all the reminiscing and laughing about how tough we thought Bash was. and then he took out his grade book, and started reading off all this stuff from the first two months of school, like what he marked down everyday. and every single goddamn day I HAD A ZERO. and sometimes a "talked to after class."

And oddly enough, i have finally earned the respect of the asshole boys in my class. By the end of Bash's rattling, it was just down to calling my name and saying:
"Monday October 21-Talya. Zero.Tuesday October 22-Talya. Zero.etc.etc."

And then everyone was like...WOW! and started clapping and i got up and bowed and attempted a TravisBarkeresque tardy speech but everyone was still clapping and i was cracking up.

Yes, being the center of attention in a class in which ive been basically ignored in all year felt REALLY GOOD. hehe. okay i love attention so shoot me.

hmm, my principal just found out about some insane party that someone in my grade threw and now pple may be expelled.

Maybe theres something more to staying apart from the crowd afterall...I have but one thing to say to the moron who was dumb enough to throw a class party with drugs and all that, when repercussions=speedy expulsion:

was the pot worth it? and...if youre gonna do that shit, DONT DO IT WITH A THOUSAND OTHER PEOPLE. cos sooner or later someone important will find out, cos thats how my school is.

BIG
FUCKING
BROTHER.

Tali

2003-06-01T00:01:00.000-04:00

Okay, he was only all of those lovely things for a few hours. Now everythings okay, for now.

*peachy to say the least*

*winks*

just borrowing a few words of profoundness. if thats a word. sounds like profanity. YES! fuck rawks.

Okay tata for now.

Tali

2003-05-31T19:02:00.000-04:00

yes i was right.

hes a piece of shit.

well there goes another bastard, asshole, shithead, cocksucker, dumbfuck, shitforbrains, pansy, mind fucking, ass fucking, self fucking, mother fucking PIECE OF SHIT.

i really hope he fucks himself over a pitchfork, shits himself AND DIES.

oh and did i mention he dresses like a girl?

Tali

2003-05-31T17:50:00.000-04:00

Okay now i sit and write.

Things here have been okay. Really hectic, cos moving the entire apartment around for gramma, whose coming home Wednesday.

School's been fun and also really insanely busy. I had my anatomy final on Thursday (94 yay!) and my jewish history final on Friday, which was pretty damn hard, anyway oh well.

This weekend, ive been straightening all my stuff up, and working on my spanish magazine, fuck it has to be all decorated and everything, and im still typing up articles that i dont have from when my computer crashed. my what fond memories...

Schools also been kinda fun, cos you know, classes end wednesday, so all the teachers are kinda slowing down a bit, and not teaching so much. I dont know why, but this past week, my appetite has been insane, ive been eating everything in site, argh! But i think its curbed itself over the weekend cos i have no time to eat cos im working so goddam hard. Akk..hehe so me and diana and sometimes sharon have been raiding Shop Rite almost every day this week cos school food just isnt good enough.

Yesterday, well last night was nice. I went to shul. I KNOW WIERD. i havent been to shul (synagoguge) not on rosh hashanah or yom kippur in like, years. i went to hang out with yael and nicole, it was fun...and there was some lavish Bat Mitzvah going on with wierd grass animal sculptures, hmm. hehe, but it was nice.

and now im just sitting. and thinking. about spanish. hm and AJ telling me that he still has a bit of a thing for this girl...well thats nice, i think itll be over in a sec.

ill keep you posted, haha get it...posted...ha. :8)

laters!

Tali

2003-05-29T22:58:00.000-04:00

have not been here in a while, and for all the two of you who read this, i hope you enjoy.

Hmm ive got a bit of de ja vu, and for those who know me superwell, you know thats not a good thing, cos when i get de ja vu i cant function, and i get in a wierd mood for a few hours. jesus. anyway, details later, but i met a cool guy, and now im owned. okay cant think, more later.

Tali

2003-05-26T10:38:00.000-04:00

Hallloooo!

I in such a BIZZare state cos i like didnt sleep last night at all...eeeeekk! insomniac me bah. anywho haha i just called diana at like 10:20 cos she was supposed to come today, and her mom answered and i guess she was surprised or pissed cos it was so early so she was like...

"HUH? who is this?"

"Umm...its Talya, i was wondering if diana was there?"

"HUH? she is sleeping!"

"Oh, okay sorry well can you please tell her to call me when she wakes up?"

"OKAY"

hahahahahaha nothing out of the ordinary.

Anyway if Diana doesnt come over then ill hang out with nicole for a bit. but the thing is i have this killer talmud test tomorrow and i never take notes in that class so...i photocopied someone elses notes and i really have to learn it really really well but i also really wanna go out. oh well, ill study tonight i guess, eeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

okay im so hyper.

Tali

2003-05-25T23:20:00.000-04:00

mweeheehee. Lookee, im a schitzo...

schizotypal

Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

I guess Jude likes schizos...

Jude Law: you like them romantic and British with
beauiful green eyes.

Which guy are you destined to have sex with?
brought to you by Quizilla

so I'll fuck Jude while listening to...

Rock on, dude! You are Punk music!

What type of music are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

awhight.

wait so im a lez who likes to screw jude?

You are the typical feminist, depressed, artist.
You go against the crowd and do everything you
can to be different. Too bad noone notices.
Try communicating with people, not just looking
down on them.

What kind of typical high school character from a movie are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

and i am no longer me, or a lez. Jude's been fooled.

Rock on. You're Courtney Love.

What sexy girl are you
brought to you by Quizilla

But then, Jude will freek even more once he realizes that im not me, not a lez, not even courtney, but...

Funny Asian Man

What's Your Personality Type?
brought to you by Quizilla

an asian man whos also a punk...

you're punk!

How can I label you?
brought to you by Quizilla

OKAY THIS IS ALL GETTING TOO FREEKY. EVEN FOR ME!

catch me out of frisch and in...

Princeton
You're smart, you're thin, you're pretty, and
goddamit, people love you. You are destined for
great, great things, little Princetonian. Let
there be a never-ending stream of Country-Club-
Like institutions in your unmarred future.

Which Ivy League University is right for YOU?
brought to you by Quizilla

what? princeton my fucking ass. will the madness never end????????!!!!!!!!!!

Tali

2003-05-25T22:15:00.000-04:00

okay ill fuck you really hard stephen but ONLY COS YOURE BEGGING.

stephen malkmus (pavement): he is clever, and you
are hot shit. go find a shady lane and fuck
off!

who's your indie rock boyfriend?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-05-25T22:07:00.000-04:00

Okies Im all better now.

I realized that i have the opportunity to go to this party. My friend Diana called me earlier and she usually doesnt want to go to these things, but she wanted to go tonite to meet this guy AJ, and she wanted me to come...and i technically could have. I mean, i could have taken a bus to jersey, it doesnt take that long, and my mom was cool with it cos i had spoken to her earlier...but i realized that NO i just didnt want to go! So Im back in control. Now its all me choosing not to interact with these frisch japs.

Alright so speaking of this guy AJ...Diana started talking to him a bit ago, they met or something threw friends, only never in person, just on the phone and stuff. And I went to his website this week, and commented on something randomely and he emailed me and we started to talk about nothing really. So diana and i had this whole image of him being this really cool and chill guy...cos he doesnt go to some uppity yeshiva. but i was talking to him earlier and hes actually going to this party, i mean like he really wants to go. Bizarre...wanting to go to a frisch party when no ones holding a gun to your head. So i was talking to diana and shes like...WOH guess hes not so cool after all. And i kinda wanted to chill with him and di toms, but now...uh uh not really. well you know, id chill with him just for the hell of it, but whatever.

I need to get back into the normal swing of things like not writing about these asinine things. whatever, i guess theyre on my mind so what else would go here... >-( ---> cross me again. only not so cross, just bored as shit.

kies im out.

Ciao!

Tali

2003-05-25T14:18:00.000-04:00

im cross.

Tali

2003-05-25T14:05:00.000-04:00

bah.

Tali

2003-05-25T13:45:00.000-04:00

Okay, someone please tell me

what the hell is so great about a frisch party? Okay cos here's what they all are (besides being all the same):

people dancing and sometimes getting drunk if parents are away...otherwise people just sitting there and eating. and sometimes, some kids will sneak away to make out. thats about it.

so why the hell is everyone going tonight? i mean i could...but i dont want to! also i cant get there...hmm.

Why do i feel like im not part of my grade AT ALL? i mean even my friends go to these asinine parties, but i just dont want to because it would mean...conforming to the yeshiva definition of "cool." thats what they all think they are, cool...and i dont want to be part of that...Im waiting, and have been waiting for so long just to get out of the bubble that theyre so helplessly stuck in...and they dont even realize it, they never will...

the thing is, ive been trying so hard and for so long to seperate myself. i dont just want to be one of them, one of the crowd. one of those girls who wears those clothes or behaves that way. cos i used to be like that. and then i woke up and realized what a sad state i was in...and then i made it my business to get the hell out at all costs and never to conform and never to be one of them ever again. And i hate that im still stuck in this world, i hate it! i want to practice my religion my own way, from the heart, and i just want to be a good person and i DONT want to live my life, bound up by meaningless rules and restrictions that have no bearing on my inner self. i dont want to be like these people i dont i dont, and thats why i dont want to associate with them because it would be undoing all my work and effort.

but i dont know how healthy it is. I mean, if people are going, shouldnt i at least TRY and have fun? I guess its not something that really matters so much...only the thing is, i know that i wouldnt have fun. well maybe. but on a very superficial level.

well isnt superficiality okay once in a while? why does everything always have to be deep and ridden with meaning?

so what if i went...so id have some meaningless fun for a while, and i may even enjoy myself.

then again.

not.

Tali

2003-05-24T18:16:00.000-04:00

yowza

2003-05-24T16:18:00.000-04:00

lookee here...

hahaha

You're the Hipster Intellecticus. Call yourself
what you will (beatnik, philosophy major,
liberal arts student), you're still hip and you
still dig Kerouac.

What Kind of Hipster Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

yeah. kerouac. *shifts eyes around room*

Tali

2003-05-24T15:23:00.000-04:00

I just remembered this dream I had last night.

I dont remember why, but for some reason...well something happened to my mom. She didnt die, but for some reason she was incapacitated and couldnt take care of me anymore.

So I was sent to live with Jeff. Okay this is bizarre, i havent been thinking about him since...

And anyway, I was fucking sleeping in the room with him. His mom or someone put a bed next to his, this really puffy blue bed that had bars on the side like a hospital bed. And oh man, he was just so vivid in my dream...so clear...i still remember it so well, and I usually forget my dreams right away.

So heres where it gets really bizarre.

Jeff was throwing some sort of end-of-the-year party, and so many people were there. And all these seniors were there, but all guys, and some people whose names i dont know. and i remember walking around in pajamas being really depressed and wondering where my mother was.

So then Gil showed up...and he was the only one to really recognize me...so he came over to me and started screaming at me. He was like...Why didnt you tell me you and Jeff were related...why didnt you tell me you bitch? and i was thinking...i didnt know he and i were related, i just thought i was sent here cos I liked jeff...

And then i remember looking at jeff for an answer and he just looked really confused too.

So then I ran onto the hospital bed and started bawling.

And thats all I remember. Really wierd.

Wow.

Tali

2003-05-23T23:37:00.000-04:00

does this feckin work at all?

Tali

2003-05-22T23:39:00.000-04:00

here i sit, at sharos house after a looooooooooong day at six flags. ohh man, it was so rainy and wet, and in the first one minute, my pants got soakking wet on the bottoms, so i was wet and raint the entire day--sucked arse.

it was kinda fun though besides that. We had to do an arse physics packet, but justin did most of it, si we had the the rest of the afternoon off. sharo and i rode the cows. :8)

moo spinspin.

and we also went on rolling thunder. so wooden. so creakuy. sp rollercoasty. bye bye estomago.

so now me and justin are at shars and justin is having fun shitting for hours. the fun never stops yee haw!!

ride em cowboy.

*swings lasso*

Ciao!

Tali

2003-05-21T20:41:00.000-04:00

Fuck, another day.

I dont know, i think this may all just be pms. but, Sharon and I had a much needed talk, and things are cooler now. I finally got out all the things ive wanted to say for so long, way too long. So at least thats better now.

Of course when one thing goes right, as per course of nature, another thing must go terribly wrong. Today was the college guidance meeting in school. jesus fucking christ, dont you just love it when parents think they know what theyre talking about, but really they know shit from well...i dont know how that phrase finishes, but basically my mom is so fucking stubborn and hardheaded and she really knows nothing about the process, but thinks she knows better than the fucking guidance counselor. its so annoying...oh well, i guess itll be more of an issue at the startt of next year, where my mom wants me to apply early and where i clearly should.

okay basically in a nutshell. My mom has this notion that I can get into columbia. Im pretty smart and i have pretty great credentials, but im just not columbia material, math sats etc...so dr. furmans like to my mom...look you have to get realistic. talya probably will not get into columbia, and speaking from experience she doesnt have the greatest chance. But if she applied to BU,and did it early not only would she get in, but shed get a TON of scholarship, if not almost full, because shes really smart, and has great extra currics etc etc...

and of course my mom is like no. i want her to apply to columbia early. she hasnt worked this hard for nothing. blah blah blah...and if i dont apply to BU early, i wont get as much scholarship.

its pretty fucking clear that my mom needs a good bitchslap. *rubs hands together*

school has also been getting to me, its just gone on for too fucking long and im so sick of it. imsick of so many of the people,and all the moronic things they obsess over, and im just too tired to care anymore. I truly am running on empty. the only thing really keeping me from collapsing is the thought that school is over, including finals, in like three weeks...so close...

back to life.

PDA
Interpol

Yours is the only version of my desertion that I could ever subscribe to
That is all that I can do
You are a past dinner, the last winner, I'm raping all around me
Until the last drop is behind you
But you're so cute when you're frustrated, dear
Yeah, you're so cute when you're sedated, oh dear

Sleep tight, grim rite, we have two hundred couches where you can...
Sleep tight, grim rite, we have two hundred couches where you can
Sleep tonight,
Sleep tonight,
Sleep tonight,
Sleep tonight.

You are the only person who's completely certain there's nothing here to be into
That is all that you can do
You are a past sinner, the last winner, and everything we've come to makes you you

But you cannot safely say that while I will be away, you will not consider sadly
How you helped me to stray
And you will not reach me I am resenting a position that's past resentment and now
I can't consider, and now there is this distance, so...

Oh god, i think im going to be sick.

Tali

2003-05-19T23:06:00.000-04:00

Today Angus shocked me with his bizarre electric shock pen and it hurt!

so i said
AHH WORST DAY EVER!
and he said
I DONT GET IT, HOW COULD IT BE WORST DAY EVER IF ITS A PEN? WOULDNT IT BE WORST PEN EVER??!!

and then i started cracking up cos ive been using that phrase for more than a year, and no one has ever bothered to say that...that worst day doesnt make sense.

sometimes people who state the obvious can be so funny.

Ciao!

Tali

2003-05-19T22:41:00.000-04:00

I HAD A BRAIN THAT FELT LIKE PANCAKE BATTER.

oh jesus, this is annoying, now shell confront me and i HATE confrontations.and she always makes me feel so goddamn guilty. argh

i will stand up for myself!

and my right!

to parrrrr tayyy!

Tali

2003-05-19T22:19:00.000-04:00

Yeah, today was really wierd.

I guess i was just in a wierd mood or something, like i usually am. it could be cos i had two big tests today, and one was at the start of the day, and one was last period, so that made me pretty preoccupied the whole day. Also, i had to take care of all this other stuff, like stuff for the paper, and essays that were also due today, that i was really kind of alone the whole day, but like cos i WANTED to be. well not the whole day obviousely, but im usually ALWAYS with someone, and today i really didnt feel like being around anyone!

Possible reasons:
-i was tired
-i was busy
-i actually like the feeling of being in charge of so many things i have to take care of, and so being with someone else makes it feel less, i dont know, official? i know that is SO retarded, but just how I felt.

also, honestly,shar was kind of annoying me today, so i think she thinks im mad at her or something . what i dont get is that I can be annoyed with someone and not want to spend time with her at a certain moment, but then she, and not necessarily shar, just anyone, thinks that im MAD at them, and then makes me feel really bad. when the truth is, shar was just annoying the shiz out of me, so i really didnt want to be around her. cosss...this was her all day:

OMG LIKE THERE ARE LIKE SO MANY *school name* PARTIES LIKE OMG AND RACHEL WANTS ME TO GO TO THIS ONE AND STEPHANIE WANTS ME TO GO TO THIS ONE AND BLAHBLAHBLAH AND LIKE *twirl hair* LIKE I REALLY DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO AND LIKE LIKE LIKE LIKE

yeah...and can you blame me for not wanting to be around that all day?
i thought NOT!
so now of course, she probably thinks im pissed at her, cos we didnt talk after school or whatever. oh sigh, why do i have a feeling this will blow up tomorrow? i cant help it, i cant take it when my friends start to act all jappy and like POOR ME EVERYONE LOVES ME!

OH
GOD.

jesus, hehe anyway...gonna shower and trrryy to make an early night of it.

Ciao!

Tali

2003-05-18T22:45:00.000-04:00

This is the song thats been in my head like a bitch over this weekend

The Hardest Button to Button

The White Stripes

We started living in an old house
My ma gave birth and we were checking it out
It was a baby boy
So we bought him a toy
It was a ray gun
And it was 1981
We named him Baby
He had a toothache
He started crying
It sounded like an earthquake
It didnt last long
Because I stopped it
I grabbed a rag doll
And stuck some little pins in it
Now were a family
And were alright now
We got money and a little place
To fight now
We dont know you
And we dont owe you
But if you see us around
I got something else to show you
Well its easy when you dont know better
You think its sleazy?
Then put it in a short letter
We keep warm
But theres just something wrong when you
Just feel like youre the hardest button
To button
I had opinions
That didnt matter
I had a brain
That felt like pancake batter
I got a backyard
With nothing in it
Except a stick
A dog
And a box with something in it

woo! anyway, i worked a LOT this weekend...yawn, what else is new?
friday i hung out with some friends i hadnt seen in a while that was cool. HAHA and then Wednesday, is parents
meeting with Pheobe, college guidance couunselor. who is bald.
i also dont think shell be helping me with the college thing really, cos she overheard me describe
in great detail about how i was fascinated with her lack of hairdom.

yeah..hello college

ciao!

Tali

2003-05-16T23:53:00.000-04:00

Hey everyone!

today was really fun. i was in a bit of a shiza-ey mood yesterday, but things were fun as hell today. shar, justin, and i were standing around for a half hour playing the vagina game. for those of you who are unfamiliar, this is how you play the vagina game:

-take a movie title
-substitute the word vagina for any word in the movie title
-laugh

so here are some good ones we came up with:

1) The Vagina King
2) Full Vagina Jacket
3) Vagina on 34th Street
4) Dead Vagina Walking---my own favorite
5) My Big Fat Greek Vagina---justin cried at that one

HAHA okay im done now. hahahaha....yeehaw!

CIAO!

Tali!

2003-05-15T22:36:00.000-04:00

TODAY SUCKED.

GUYS SUCK.

EVERYONE SUCKS.

AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

of course im still like wasted on him. WDE.

this all sucks.

WHAT THE HELL? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?

WHY IS EVERYTHING FALLING APART?

ahhhh i am so in a bad state. jesus christ.

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK.

Tali

2003-05-11T21:07:00.000-04:00

restless.

mothers day. exhausted. spent entire fucking day in monsey. dont ask. i mean i love my family and all, but man the entire day in monsey...oh god, that place is so depressing. suburbia jewland. not fun and very cold. and i had homework to do and i couldnt feckin do it. and now ive gotta crack down and finish my annoying as shit spanish story.the one where eyerman wrote "que paso?" you moron, its not supposed to have a fuckn ending. its artistic.plus i was just too damn laxy. sigh anyway. just wanted to take a break...im such a procrastinator dammit. back i go, to weave the ever fascinating tale of antonio valdez.

YAY.

Tali

2003-05-10T19:24:00.000-04:00

hiiii!!

yeah i was so happy before,i mean i still am, but im just soo tired. i think all of this has finally caught up with me...

anywho, first off, today was fun. i went shopping for my moms gift for tomorrow. so i went to bloomingdales and i bought Ibiza Hippie (finally!) and it smells so good mmmm. i picked it up to buy it and the salesguy was like, in this thick french accent
"no! such a young pretty girl should not have to wait on ze line. come come!"

and he escorted me to the front of the line! and i felt so bad cos there were tons of people online, you know, last minute mothers day shopping (like me!) but i didnt wanna diss that cool guy.

so then i was about to leave and go to Tower for my mom's gift...but i decided, you know what, why dont i get her a nice perfume, something shell really enjoy. anyway, i decided this as i was walking out...and then I turned back and went to the nearest salesperson, im looking for a gift for my mom.

those few words, and in two seconds, there are like, eight or nine salespeople engulfing me, spritzing perfumes into my face, in all their phony french and british accents...christ, i thought i would die of vanilla, spice, roses, and claustrophobia. anyway, there was this one really biatchy young salesgirl and she was like...come dear, let me show you some lovely yves saint lauren and i was like..HUH? and there was another who was trying to help and the biatchy one goes:
"oh dont listen to her dear. im afraid shes really not got too much up there if you know what i mean!"
"no i dont know. why dont you tell me?"

SNORE

anywho, just to take some commision away from biatchy girl, i went to stupid girl, who ended up being SOO nice and a HUGGEE help, and plus she gave me this whole set for free! I bought an Anna Sui scent for mom, and i didnt have enough for the biggest size which comes with all these free goodies, so i got the medium size and the salesgirl is like...(thick ruskie accent)..."i tell you wrong price for big one and now you cannot get it! i feel bad. i give you free gift because i sorry." AWWW! i was so thankful!

so yea, that was fun. then i came home and....did absolutely nothing which felt so good yaya!

okay, im out...laters!

Tali

2003-05-09T23:04:00.000-04:00

WEEEEEEEE!!!

YAYAYAYAYAYA!

APs
are
OVER.

*breathes deeply and runs around the room shaking out her hair and tripping over those perfume sample jarry things*

So, the AP actually went not so well. first, the multiple choice was murder i was really unsure about like, more than half, no exaggeration. so the essays, okay. well, me and eitan had been talking before about how we had both absolutely not studied the Great Depression at all, and that we hoped there wouldnt be an essay on it. LO AND BEHOLD!

proctor:you may open the green packet with the essay questions. You have 15 minutes to plan your Document Based Essay."
(i open the book.)
(i see a picture of FDR.)
(i look to the question.)

"Analyze Franklin D. Roosevelt's response to the Great Depression. State how the government changed roles during his administration."

me: HOLY SHIT. FUCK FUCK FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. HOLY SHIT. HOLY SHIT. HOLY SHIT. I HOPE THE COLLEGE BOARD DIES BY CHOKING ON ITS OWN CRAP.

then of course i became sooo flustered and nervous, that i did something so stupid. i was able to answer the question somewhat okay, but then i forgot about the second half! i answered it kinda indirectly somewhere in the essay, but not explicitely SO THAT FUCKS UP MY GRADE BIG TIME.

ugh.

the rest were okay though. i wrote a killer essay on transportation.

I KNOW THIS IS JUST SO INTERESTING!

well, then our principle decided NOT to give us the rest of the day off like he had promised, (bastard), so me, being me, who can never just take things and whose sooo damn stupid. shit. i couldnt take it. especially cos the test ended so late that there was no lunch left. so i stormed into the principles (stein-hes a really scary man, not not not a force to be reckoned with, plus hes gotten me into trouble so many times, and i always just push things cos im a moron) office, and i was like:
me-"Hi. since you suddenly took our afternoon away, can we all at least go out and get lunch? weve just taken a three and a half hour test and were hungry and theres no food."
stein-excuse me? i didnt take it away. you all cut school on wednesday to study, its your fault.
me-some of us didint cut, dr stein, like myself. and now i cant even get lunch.
stein-(screaming)-YOU KNOW WHAT? DO WHAT YOU WANT, I DONT CARE!
me-uhh? what does that mean? can we leave?
stein-I DONT CARE.

so of course i had no clue what to do, but me and shar left anyway and just told the teachers we were going home. then we went to panaras for lunch (mm caesar salad) and baskin robbins for ice cream and we just hung out and LET LOOSE and had fun cos the test was finally over.oh man did we have fun, just going nuts and laughing uncontrolably, and being US and not caring and just you know...eating. haha no seriousely tho, sharo is the bestest friend in the world i would def DIE without her. thats my tribute to sharo. :8) PIGGIE!

so we were gonna sneak back to school to catch the busses, and i guess i came too late cos i fucking missed my bus,and i had to take a two hour public transportation trip.yaya for me. So then i threw a bit of a hissy fit and justin was unsuportive until he saw i was really mad, and then i hugged him really hard and while doing so,LOCKED EYES WITH DAZED! mmmm..hes soo fucking hot, oh god. but he saw me throw a fit. that cant ever be good. at least i was with people this time.

So then i came home and relaxed. im so happy this is all over, you know? i mean,i still have my history sat2 in june, but i wont have to study history for a while, and thatd fine with me. also the sat2 is a bit easier. and then finals, but those are okay.

This weekends busy, mothers day and all and yeah, im still in a super mood. Just feel like putting these lyrics here to Coldplay's In My Place, cos thats my song of the past two weeks.

In my place, in my place
Were lines that I couldn't change
I was lost, oh yeah
And I was lost, I was lost
Crossed lines I shouldn't have crossed
I was lost, oh yeah

Yeah, how long must you wait for it?
Yeah, how long must you pay for it?
Yeah, how long must you wait for it?
(Oh for it)

I was scared, I was scared
Tired and underprepared
But I wait for it

If you go, if you go
Leave me down here on my own
Then I'll wait for you (yeah)

Yeah, how long must you wait for it?
Yeah, how long must you pay for it?
Yeah, how long must you wait for it?
(Oh for it)

(Sing it) Please, please, please
Come back and sing to me
To me, me

Come on and sing it out, now, now
Come on and sing it out, to me, me
Come back and sing it

In my place, in my place
Were lines that I couldn't change
And I was lost, oh yeah, oh yeah

i know those lyrics seem so simple, but chris martin has a way of making the most simple lyrics mean so much...he makes them so profound. he is beautiful. a twat, but lovely.

okay im out...talking to sharo WOO!

ciao

Tali

2003-05-07T23:07:00.000-04:00

wow the days are just soo good!

i took my english comp AP yesterday, and i think it went pretty well, and i have my US history one on friday. the thing is, i know everything up to and including the civil war sooo damn well, and i know NOTHING afterwards! shit shit shit, im going to bury myself in books tomorrow. Stein, principal, gave us the afternoon off (he couldnt give us the morning, i know, that wouldnt be annoying and assholey enough) so me and shar are gonna study in the morning, like REALLY study and not goof off, and ill be home by one, and ill study till nine. okay eight hours, thats good enough.

shit.

not panicking or anything. OR ANYTHING!! FUCKKKKK!!

okay im cool. breeeeaaatthhhee.ooommmm ooommm hyyymeeennnnn.

anywho, things in school are so funny. underclassmen are the shiz. underclassmen, usually reffers to freshmen. im sorry, everyone hates freshmen cos theyre so goddam annoying and bubbly, but i have to say, some of the boys are SO AWESOME and funnnnn!!

fun being:
-adam (shmad)-OMG TALI! I HAVE TO GO TELL ILAN! (dash) NOICE!
-ilan (sortacute)-heeyyy ladies
-ariel. just cos he curses so naturally. you know, how when guys curse, it sometimes, well usually, sounds really strained and forced? i HATE that...and i met him cos hes on shar's bus, and i was just like, haha hes so funny. he was actually dissing this "popular" soph and saying fuck you to her a lot and shes all giggly like "ariel hahaha" and hes like "shut up youre so annoying and your boyfriend has no penis." HAHAHAHAHA damn hes so young.
-fake greg. spitting image of ex, only younger. so when i see him, i screeeaamm--FAKE GREG! and i think hes starting to notice hahaha. ohh poor him. hes got poppy outty eyes, he always has this expression on his face like, "why am i wet down there (shock)?"

GO FRESHMEN! haha oh i exude coolness, dont i?

oh life is good again! weeee! im in such a super mood.

DAZED AND CONFUSED IS HOT. omg. im such a dork what the hell am i writing? hehe...anywho,back to my world of fun...so i can go to sleep wee! semi early night!

NOICE!!

ciao!

Tali

2003-05-05T22:42:00.000-04:00

Halloooo!!

today was the SHIZ.

i dont know, i guess with all the seniors gone, and us being the oldest, its like...HELLO! EGO ENLARGEMENT! i know that whole thing with senior superiority is SUCH bullshit, but i have to say, with some sort of experience and being so close to it and all...it feels AWESOME. haha its put me on a power trip. this is so unhealthy. Next thing youll see me paddling freshmen, a la Dazed and Confused. Mwahahahahaha....O'Bannion is my hero, what an asshole, but the total shiz.

In other news, heres a list of pple who have got me totally enamored:
-Dazed and Confused boy. yes, still giving people nicknames, yes, am a total dork. well, not just me, my best friend, Sharon and I, its this soph and hes soo soo soo HOT. we drool over him. O MAN. he gives us that tingly feeling, mwahaha. So named cos he reminds us of Tony from the godly flick, even though they really dont look much alike except for the blushing and the hair color.
-Jeff, of course, helloo welcome to my world. (where have you been?)
-Conor Oberst OMG HE MAKES ME BURST! haha please excuse me, my sense of humor is totally rediculous. But oh man, is he hot or what...Bright Eyes mmmmmmmm
-my one, my only, i will always be loyal to you, julian (casablancas of course, derrr)

I guess the whole thing with the seniors being gone is kinda starting to sink in. i mean, yeah its a little meh. inducing and kinda like, sigh. Ive been listening to "in my place" by coldplay on repeat for like, hours and the lyrics are just so sad and little just, you want to like,curl up and be sad. heres the part thats really got me:
"i was scared, i was scared
tired and underprepared
but ill wait for it
and if you go, if you go
and leave me down here on my own
then ill wait for you."

AWW!! poor sad chris martin. haha sad my ass, hes all happy and lovey with gwyn. DIE GWYNETH DIE! haha just kidding, she can have him. Ive got bigger fish to fry.

although who would wanna kiss fried fish i dunno.

drat there goes my terrible sense of humor again--so sorry *bangs head flat on table*

ciao!

Tali

2003-05-04T19:15:00.000-04:00

BURP!

hey everyone!

I studied all day today, and now im totally exausted...i really really really...lost my train of thought just now. hmm.

I woke up this morning and i knew that i had had a few dreams but i couldnt think of what they were! i just woke up thinking:

1) How excited for college i am. i know i still have a year to go, but being the oldest in school now, and getting so much closer to next year makes the whole thing so real, almost tangible! i know that sounds crazy but im sooo excited. plus, i really hope i get into a good boston school. Boston has to be my favorite place (although thats not saying so much as i dont ever really travel), and i love it soo much.
2) How much i dont want to stay in new yok for college. I know everyone loves it, everyone loves the city, and no one can ever understand that it can actually get boring, but after living here my whole life, it really has gotten very boring. i know every inch of this city, and theres nothing about it that excites me anymore. I dont know why i would stay here, unless i would get into columbia *crosses fingers* but i dont know how good my chances for that are.
3) If this girl im not even friends with gave the finger to this guy im not friends with either. Why i was thinking about that, i have no idea.

I also had an Interpol song stuck in my head, PDA. yeah, thats the good thing about the city, all the local bands here. there are always gigs at some venue or another, and theyre mostly pretty cheap, even for good bands like blonde redhead or the like.

ahh, well im out, gonna relax, maybe watch Dazed and Confused (an excellent movie!)

CIAO!

Tali

2003-05-03T21:09:00.000-04:00

she finishes her work...

wow, ive been studying all day, and now im so wiped. I actually feel like the blood thats expelling itself from my body. great visual, eh?

So anyway, the seniors have left school and its THE wierdest feeling! first off, i had lots of friends in that grade, who im going to miss soooo much. Also, its just the grade above us, theyve always been here, and suddenly, its like, were the oldest people in school. Im virtually a senior. woh. the time has flown like a bitch. I remember my first day of freshman year like it was yesterday...I was that token annoying girl with the frizzy hair, braces, and huge backpack who would crash in to everyone and everything just by walking down the hallway...the kind that would giggle with her equally as annoying friends over the "hot seniors"

And i think about that, as a Junior, who will be done with her junior year in a month and a half and i think to myself...where the hell did that time go??? it seems like a month ago that i came into school...and now, im going to be applying to college in a few months! its all so surreal...

And i know its so cliche, but the changes ive gone through over that past three years have been absolutely like...BAM! ive developed so drastically both physically and emotionally. Ive gone through different groups of friends, dumped some and lost some just the same. I dont know if highschool can necessarily be described in this generalization of being the "best four years of your life", but its definitely a time when so much changes, and you come closer to finding out who you are, and if not, youve got some clue of what kind of person you would like to become, or whats inevitable for you to become...

anyway, yeah its that...its bizarre. A very bizarre feeling. I think Im gawna call a friend now, im feeling kinda mellow, in sort of a negative way.

Tali

2003-05-03T18:49:00.000-04:00

weee!!!

LOOK AT THIS!!!

:8) its a piggie!

Tali

2003-05-03T18:23:00.000-04:00

So here I sit...

and all my friends are also studying for APs and some are taking SATs tomorrow, so my social life right now is basically zilch. thats okay cos soon this will all be over...

im really in the mood to write something worth reading, but im soo tired, i dont have the energy, plus, there's blood spurting from my vagina. oh yeah. that.

Tali

2003-05-03T17:44:00.000-04:00

HOLY SHIT!

a pigeon just flew into my window and its DYING. holy fuckaduck, man thats ugly. eeekkkk!! OMG this is gross.

Tali

2003-05-03T17:34:00.000-04:00

munching on yogurt raisins, mmmm.

Tali

2003-05-03T17:30:00.000-04:00

wanna fanta dont you wanna wanna fanta blah blah blah.

FUCK HISTORY.

hmm. and also dont forget to brush your teeth and eat a good good breakfast.

2003-05-03T16:32:00.000-04:00

just some nice lyrics:

Let’s meet in the city where
the rivers cross, bridges there
Let’s float down into the stream
of Rich and Poor Pioneers
A kid from a western town
wants to be seen, and go out
Let’s borrow my parent’s car
Let’s stay out all night up there
and Burnside will be our street
Where the kids and the hookers meet
Diners and strip club junk
Bookstores and punk rock clubs

I’m as green as this blade
in the grass that bends
in the wind that blows
on the long weekends
where I cross the bridge
to the water fountains
and drink in the hope
that the city brings
(Water, Building and Sin
Big Oregon city draws you in
A promise fulfilled or not
Just hang on until the summer, it’s hot)

We’ll make our home water-tight
Work all day, play all night
And hope we’re not washed away
By deceit or tragedy
And Joan of Arc rules Northeast
Where the poor and the hipsters meet
The grid that divides us all
The River makes final call
Out at the edge of town
Where airfield runs water down
Coyote crosses old tracks
And hops on the Light-Rail Max

And if you wanna be a friend of mine
Cross the river to the east side
Find me on the eve of suicide
Tell me the city is no place to hide
Take me out into a sunny day
Through the grotto or the promenade
You came to me in the nick of time
Thankful for the things I left behind

Oh dirty river, come let me in

courtesy of the Sleater Kinney godesses.

ciao!

Tali

2003-05-03T15:50:00.000-04:00

woo! only 6 more hours of studying to go!

YAY.

Tali

2003-05-03T13:23:00.000-04:00

Hey everyone!!

here i sit, studying for my US History AP and wishing so strongly that my head was in a toilet. I woke up this morning with my period. HURRAY! and now i have to sit and studdy all fukn day long...why???????
please tell me WHY!!!??

alright if i complain any more my head will implode. back to the ever fascinating foreign policy of President Harrison. Yes, yes, i know...there was actually a president harrison. whoulda thunkit.

Tali

2003-05-02T21:58:00.000-04:00

Halloooo *waves*

Just started this thing up...

A bit about me, my names Tali, im 16, a junior in highschool...

Today was insanneee. It was the seniors last day, so they were all goin nuts and of course, the rest of us had class. But it was way too hard to go cos i have a bunch of friends in that grade so i ditched some of my classes...and then of course at the end of the day i was called to the vice principal's office and shes all blahblah detention.

*snorts*

like i ever go to detention...

anywho, besides that, ive been infected with spring fever its fuunnn! The trees in the front of my school (which is located in an area kind of like an industrial park) have begun to sprout leaves and little shrubs, so everything is all pretty and red and pink. and i think theyre begining to emit radioactive spooge but thats okay, we can all suffocate to death in a pretty school at least!

My friend eitan caught a fish in the river by my school and it had like, yellow blood. i know cos he cut it open. yep, welcome to my world. mwahahaaaa

Tali

2003-05-02T21:51:00.000-04:00

weeeee this is fun!!

speaking of wee...

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/weeee.html

click and enjoy at your own discretion...:8)

Tali